you guys were way drunker than both of me
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
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