Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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