I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize