He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
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getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
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I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
You were trust falling into bushes
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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