so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
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she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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