I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize