I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize