haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
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