gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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