Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
just found out that she named her cat after me.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Randomize