I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
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