No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize