VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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