What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize