I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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