Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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