Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize