I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize