making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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