I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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