Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize