Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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