shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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