I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
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