You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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