farters have to be the big spoon...
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize