You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
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Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
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Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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