people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize