You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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