cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize