please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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