I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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