There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize