I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
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She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
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Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
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