Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize