Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize