i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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