Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize