he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize