Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I'm too high and old for this...
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize