I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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