Texts From Last Night

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  (970): View more from Colorado

  i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show

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  (970): i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show http://tfl.nu/yysf
  Replies (5) Good night (1611) Bad night (1044)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.

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  (817): Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have. http://tfl.nu/2nqb
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?

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  (785): Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them? http://tfl.nu/f0lg
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"

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  (503): I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina" http://tfl.nu/3nun
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people

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  (267): Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people http://tfl.nu/f8ee
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  (971): View more from Oregon

  you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?

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  (971): you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything? http://tfl.nu/ldjb
  Replies (25) Good night (5234) Bad night (715)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night

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  (262): some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night http://tfl.nu/wjmk
  Replies (7) Good night (5203) Bad night (679)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.

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  (620): we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can. http://tfl.nu/vk8s
  Replies (5) Good night (930) Bad night (4168) Order T-Shirt
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.

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  (757): The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was. http://tfl.nu/n6wn
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us

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  (413): We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us http://tfl.nu/tf0q
  Replies (11) Good night (2124) Bad night (663)
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  (951): View more from California

  isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?

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  (951): isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together? http://tfl.nu/lg5k
  Replies (6) Good night (609) Bad night (1342) Order T-Shirt
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I want to be you.

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  (541): Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!! (306): I want to be you. http://tfl.nu/x9vb
  Replies (14) Good night (1521) Bad night (1074)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last

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  (410): i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last http://tfl.nu/j9db
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise

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  (814): i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise http://tfl.nu/29uw
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!

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  (702): Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one! http://tfl.nu/ayyz
  Replies (3) Good night (764) Bad night (220) Order T-Shirt

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