maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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