i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize