I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
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i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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