Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
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