u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize