Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
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Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
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This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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