i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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