So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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